Thursday, December 11, 2008


I am not sure what my problem was yesterday. I woke up in a bad mood, went to work in a bad mood, went through the whole day in a bad mood. Whenever I have days like that I tend to worry about my mental health. In the past I have gone through some pretty serious bouts with depression. It has been all consuming and painful. So now whenever I have a really bad day, I tend to stress out about it. Which then leads to more negative thoughts and moods.

I have discovered over the last year what a terrible thing clinical depression can be. When I first became aware that I had an issue with depression, I was lucky and did not have to try different medications and bounce around trying to find the best one or dosage. Then about 6 months ago my medication just did not seem to work anymore. It took a while to acknowledge the problem. I then bounced around on different meds until now (I hope) we have found one that works and will continue to work. However, yesterday I was seriously doubting that!

At 10:30pm when Joey got off work, I decided to go grocery shopping because I could not sleep. (Not a good thing to do when you are depressed) Over $200.oo later and still did not feel much better. I didn't get home until almost 1:00 in the morning and was up at 5. So this morning I am tired and have a headache but at least I am feeling much better.

It is amazing how depression can rule ones life. The people out there who say that it is all in the head are right. The problem is my head is screwed up at times and thank the good Lord for medication and prayer!

1 comment:

  1. I understand the thing about people thinking it is all in your head. Cool tends to think doc is overreacting and that my whole thing is in my head. Now, my paniciness is in my head but the other I think not. Hope you are geeling better today.